There was I, a man standing at the bus stop
But I was going in the opposite direction;
I did not know, because I could not remember.
“Can happen to anyone really”, forgetting your way.
I stood for hours in the cold wind and rain
Because the last bus had already passed this way.
I was dripping wet and was shivering away.
No one really noticed me standing in the rain,
Waiting for a bus that was going the opposite way.
I spoke to no one, no one spoke to me.  
As hopeless as this task seemed to be
I stuck at it until every drop of blood 
Ran out of every orifice into the road.
Drained and realising I was foolish 
To stand for so long for a bus going 
the wrong way and on the wrong side
of the street, people with stretchers
decided to take me away into the rising moon.

Grey mists live inside my head
As I crawl along the floor to my bed
Finding warm refuge
From the deluge
Of neglect degradation and poverty
Sporadic  nutrition
Non existent healing
All for the price of £200 a week.

We are the twilight people
Existing to the day we die
Neglected heaps of humanity
We wish we’d died years since
We are the forgotten race
Where once we thrived fought and loved
We live in our own excrement
Freeze to the bone even in summer
We are the exploited pensioners
Who’ve fought for the privilege
Of living free, free to die in cold misery
Freezing to death while paying for weaponry
We are the useless expendable old
As we are not productive units
Living at the mercy of con men and thieves
Murderers beaters people you’d never believe
Sitting on soft warm benches in Parliament
We are living in old people’s homes
We are being bled of our savings
We live in a country gone mad for war
Where no one matters where life is hell.

I am sitting inside this sea shell listening
To the waves that crash upon the shores,
Being taken out of my comfortable nest
As I breathe easily, softly, slowly and rest.

Breathing in the light let it swamp the dark
I count the few seconds as I hold my breath
They pass almost unnoticed but do they pass
I hold up my hand that heals my brow at last.

I listen for the soft voice waiting for the sun
It reaches my ears as the healing has begun
Walking a path to take me away from the pain
No looking over my shoulder no never again.

My thoughts merge with watery power of waves
The sound of the collisions I can always save
Locked away in my mind as I imagine light
Take a hand as I am becoming a love alike.

Waves within waves surge through my veins
I sit inside an echo chamber that explains
Where time was tied up, was thrown away;
These waves are my friends now every day.

Casting aside the shell that has surrounded me 
I am relieved that I have connected really
With me, the shell was my own invention
It was made to hold me to my intention.

Video my long standing sides
The prides
In as I’m on the box with smiles
Video my day and turn the mirror around
Video the head heap .. now listen to the sound

“Walking down the staircase
1950’s glasses glint in terror and lace
The bodies are piled high
The garden has overflowed
The killing, many years past, shown”.

Video my daydreams
Play it all through the night

“ .. rain cascaded in torrents
The roads are almost blocked
Sheets of water crashing down”.
The lonely motel where no one goes
His mother is reincarnate in his body
His hands grip the blade of a knife
The gaunt house upon the hill
Amplifies that all is ill
For a mother couldn’t
Couldn’t really kill!

Change the video wash out the black and white
Cream the screen, splash the colour in….

“flitting back over the throttled throats
The disgraced policeman played the gas joke
Many women became famous victims
And timothy hung in the air for the crows.

Video the backdrop
Lance the casting
Prepare the next few hours of….

“like the taut guitar string
That’s ready to snap, real things
Go bump in the night
So, shit, where’s the damn light?
You draw the stake up over your head
Ready to plunge into the coldest heart,
To seal the fate of the undead
To destroy his every part.”

“ … for a damsel so sweet so fair
What would she want of me
A creature with lop sided frame
A curled face
Deaf through living with the bells
A ghost of the monsters that live in hell
I should perish here as the fires lap
The famed hunchback shall welcome the trap”.

Record the latest video
Try the instant replay,
Look out for the blips, the snow, the haze….

When common sense deserts you
Insanity becomes the norm
Lights train at the backs of your eyes
Whips uncover your veins
Letting the monster loose
Is really tying the noose
Cooking the golden goose
I let it happen
Because no one really cares
I accepted the bully
As my leader
I said I would die for them.

In space time trick of living
There are many rows of windows
With no glass that yawn despairingly
At the dancing ghosts of time
Who parade into the light and fade;
In slight movement they appear
Then as quickly they disappear,
A pleasant smile a word for the ear
Caresses space a thousand light years
Is nothing more that travelling inside,
You are the driver that wants a ride
Into the past present and future.
I am the captain of a ship looking for
A coastal paradise or beach shore
Where the sorcery of life relaxes more
For in the space time magic of life
Not all is running, pushing and strife. 

Time has told me
What I am looking for,
There is an inner peace
A natural kind of cure
To all your worries dear 
To all those sorrows near, 
With an ear to listening for love
We can be capable of love
We don’t want to ignore the love.

Time won’t hold me 
When I go looking for love
We are trapped in – body shells
But we can travel, my love
Into other realms
By talking of our love
We can see the other side of life.

Time has told me
That there is a way forward
Through the tallest trees
To the meadows of love
We can wait in the sun
Laugh and dance and love
For we are in the spirit of love
We can now celebrate
When in the incarnate
We have nothing to fear
We are living inside a tear
That has no love this year.   

In space time trick of living
There are many rows of windows
With no glass that yawn despairingly
At the dancing ghosts of time
Who parade into the light and fade;
In slight movement they appear
Then as quickly they disappear,
A pleasant smile a word for the ear
Caresses space a thousand light years
Is nothing more that travelling inside,
You are the driver that wants a ride
Into the past present and future.
I am the captain of a ship looking for
A coastal paradise or beach shore
Where the sorcery of life relaxes more
For in the space time magic of life
Not all is running, pushing and strife. 

I grasp the hands of the clock and bend them into shape
To resemble, eventually, quality time better spent,
The outlines of time don’t trouble me, but is it meant
To be a kind of security, surrounded by a high fence?
Do I lend the time to anyone – is it a gift I can give?
Many hours I have spent in a kind of dull suspension
Where time does not require any kind of attention.
I look at my watch but gradually there’s no ticking
I have not noticed it because the ticks are echoing,
The hands pretend to be moving, so imagine the shock
To see they are stationary, so where do I go from here?

I grasp each minute and quickly question every second
I can’t be wasting my time this way it makes no sense,
For the time does not come around for another turn
It arrives, it displays and it is then gone, there’s no return.
Realising the nature of time and its indifference to clocks
Is like discovering the reality of gravity using hard rocks,
There are times that I wished I had never experienced;
But there is no way of unwrapping the consequences
Of times that do harm, that represent uncalled for action,
There are times when I hear words I do not want to know
I can’t undo time – I’m resigned to go with the easy flow.